Saturday, February 14, 2009

ive decided to blog yet again. now that ive let the scoots off my blog page for a bit, im free to blog freely for now. im just too lazy to set up a new blog page. really. too much hassle.and like, who visits anyway?

but really, the main reason for me blogging is to jot down the last remaining moments with one of the most respected men ive grown up with. my grandfather.

my grandfather had always been a man of strength in both calibre and faith. and being the second oldest grandaughter, ive spent most of my childhood under his guidance. oh, bless the songs he used to sing, the poems he'll recite, the sturdy black bicycle he travelled around with, his cute chicken dance, the best chocolate chip cake he would bake, etc.

but bless not the packs of cigarretes he used to have.

and now, i watch over him at eighty-two. fragile and weak, propped on a bed. every move is a torture. every word is a pain.

the past few days have been the most trying since i got back. what with his worsening condition, the cancellation of this week's plans, the babysitting and binge eating, i thought ive faced the worst. but then my grandmother's bad fall today just about killed the remaining bits of strength left.

and just as i was about to give up and cry yet for the upteenth time this week, my grandfather stretched out his hand and thanked me. and thats all the strength i ever need.

my grandfather is a fighter. he fought to stay alive this long. and i'll honor him by pressing on.